Finally, CD 1 has arrived we can finally get the show on the road.
You would think that this would be a happy day since I finally got what I wanted but I had a really bad IF day. Two of my good friends are pregnant. One kept it from me so as not to hurt me, which always hurts 10x as bad. I’m just so frustrated at the injustice of it all. Why do some people get to be surrounded by children and I have to suffer with this pain that is just beyond explanation. It is like someone is squeezing my heart and I can’t breath. I feel like I will die. It is such a simple thing I crave – a child to love. Is that too much to ask?
/cry
I don’t want to be morose. I’ve been doing so good – thinking positive thoughts and doing my meditation. The day finally comes when I can start this miracle month of IVF brought on by God’s grace and the kind heart of some very rich people and I’m bawling like an IF newbie. You would think 9 years would give me more backbone than this.
So I”m off to meditate so I can find my happy and hopeful center again. I pray to God that my ovaries shine this month with perfect eggs and that we could finally be blessed with the baby we yearn for. May I savor each day of the journey so that the prize is that much more appreciated.
This calculator was posted on Wishing4One aand is a great toy for those of us that need something to focus on besides breast tenderness, pain in the left ovary, and ...
I called the embryology lab today (repeatedly - more on this in a minute) and we had one "really good" blast that was frozen yesterday in addition to our 2 ...
I am mentally compiling a list of "Laws of Infertility" that I will one day write down here. But, today I learned an important one:"Thou shalt trust thy Follistim pen!"I ...
Oh, dildocam how I missed thee.So I had my baseline ultrasound/bloodwork for IVF #1 today! We are on our way. This is my first time for monitoring at this new ...
The first is part of the Health Journey's series by Belleruth Naparstek. It is called Guided Meditation Help for Infertility. It consists of 2 CDs and 4 (~20 min. each) ...
Still no AF. I can feel it but I'm still waiting.Tonight I "nested." That's what I'm going to call it. I arranged all my paraphernalia for stimming on a wooden ...
Well, I just got back from my mini-vacation and it was fabulous. TMI alert: frankly we lounged around naked for two full days alternating between the couch and hot tub! ...
I saw Baby Mama this evening. Overall the movie was very funny and enjoyable to watch. As an IF patient there were parts that made me cry although I'm in ...
